Relationships.

There are so many things out there, telling us what to do in relationships. All the rules, laws, cliches. Your best friend, your mom, your grandma. TV, movies, blogs, videos. And yeah, most of the time they are right. You know, "Don't go looking for Mr. Right, he'll come to you". Or "No man is worth your tears, if he was, he wouldn't make you cry". And of course, all those ridiculous rules like "playing hard to get," or "wait three days before you call." (In all fairness, that last one may be a little outdated, but you get the point.)

Although a lot of those are useful in snagging a guy, the truth is, in a real relationship, there is no-one else in the entire world who knows how the two of you are. Yes, there are patterns. The girl gets more emotionally attached first. It takes longer for the guy to do so. But at the end of the day, the two people in the relationship are two unique people and they create a unique relationship. And the ones who aren't unique, the ones who follow rules, well, the guys turn out to be jerks who aren't after a real relationship, and the girls end up sad and alone. 

So here comes another cliche: Be yourself. Be who you think you should be, be who you think you are and not what you want a man to see you as. Don't try to be what you think you should be. Don't spend hours and hours on hair and makeup that's supposed to look effortless. Don't pass yourself off as sexy and mysterious, if you're not. If you be the person you're supposed to be, the right man will think that's sexy and beautiful. And this is speaking from experience. While working, I spent an hour every day before work putting on make-up, experimenting with new hairstyles, trying on outfit after outfit, trying to impress a guy. Even though I got a few comments from co-workers, I got no response from the guy I was trying to impress. After a week or two of doing this, one day I woke up late and had no time for my ridiculous efforts, so I got dressed in the first thing I could find and headed out the door. The next night, I realised that with or without make-up, this guy was not going to notice me, so I stopped my painful routine. Two days later, I won him over and he asked me out.

For guys, winning a girl over is easy. Just show her how you feel. It's easy to buy roses and chocolates. That's sweet, but cliche. And not always true. For example, I hate roses, and I prefer white chocolate over anything else. The best way to win a girl over is to show her that you care, that you listen, show her how you feel about her. Its not hard to find presents for a girl, you just gotta pay attention. The best presents I've gotten are the ones which showed me he cared, or that he listened or that he put effort into, rather than the things I asked for, or wanted.

A lot of guys get nervous easily, and they chicken out. They come off an shy and sweet, but not boyfriend material. And then there are guys who are confident, and come off as arrogant. They come off and cocky, crass, and are clearly only after one thing. Either way, be honest about who you are and what you want. If you're nervous, then say so, but proceed anyway. Don't point out your nervousness and then hide. Show some courage. If you're after sex, then at least be honest about it. And yeah, maybe most girls will turn you down, but the ones who do say yes, will probably be worth the effort.